In my conversations with men and women, I have often observed how articulate and perceptive they are when talking about the drawbacks of others. =For couples, this relates to describing the faults of their partners, remembering every displeasing detail and sounding off on what they had done wrong. For Singles, trying to find someone, it relates to having them describe at length ” the perfect person” or the “turn offs” in a partner they seek.
Not surprisingly the emphasis is always on “others”, but never on “self”.
I seldom hear: (unless prompted of course)
What ” I” did wrong in the fight with my partner?
What are some of “my” annoying habits?
What are some of “my” traits that are less than desirable”?
Being aware of our imperfections not only allows us to be less reactionary but also makes us more accepting of others. So the next time you find yourself venting about your partner/boss/friend, stop and think. Could you have done anything to make things different?
Reflecting more (on yourself) will have you expecting less (of others).
To good health & great relationships.